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My Father-in-Law (hereinafter known as FIL) did not like blondes.
And my Mother-in-Law hated beards. These two statements go together. Just give me a moment . . . So . . . back to my FIL. No one knew why he did not like blondes. And they did ask. “Dad! Were you dumped by a blonde?” “Dad! Did some blonde do something horrible?” “Dad! Could I borrow twenty bucks?” Oh, wait, that has nothing to do with this. Back to my story . . . He passed away without ever sharing the reasons for his aversion. But his family knew it well. Whenever one of his five sons asked to borrow the car for a date, the first question was, invariably, “She’s not a blonde, is she?” To which the invariable answer was, “Oh, no, Dad! She’s not a blonde! Definitely not a blonde!” Even if she was. The keys would be produced. The date embarked upon. All was well. Yep. FIL’s aversion was well known. Sometimes a little too well known. His wife had an aversion as well. To facial hair. Here it comes . . . If her husband ever suggested that he was considering growing a beard, she had the perfect answer. “I’ll dye my hair blonde!” Even the remote possibility of beard growing disappeared instantly. Genius. In his later years, he did make allowances. I mean, he personally picked me for his son, and I had the white-blonde hair only found in people of Swedish heritage (like me) or points north. And, in fact, two of his sons married blondes. Call it parental opposition. But the mystery remains. The only other statement we ever heard from him concerning blondes was, “You know why blondes have more fun, don’t you? Because they get dirty quicker!” Hmm . . . was that a hint? In 1912, ‘going to visit the family’ took on a whole new meaning.
Let me tell you about it . . . My Gramma and Grampa Stringam, with their (then) three children, moved to southern Alberta in 1910, leaving their extended family behind them in Utah. They settled in Glenwood and started to farm. Outwardly, all was well. Inwardly, one of them missed her mother. Finally, after two years of pining and tears, the decision was made for an extended visit. Gramma and her (by then) four children packed up and, kissing Grampa goodbye, boarded the train for Salt Lake. The trip there was fairly uneventful, the highlight - seeing the sprinkler system in the Salt Lake depot. But what came afterward . . . wasn’t. Uneventful, that is. Gramma and the kids climbed aboard another train for Salina and then the mail stagecoach from there over the mountain to Thurber and Teasdale. A short hop by today’s automobile. But a considerable prospect for the white-top mail buggy of the early 1900’s. In the rain. On one particularly steep pass, soaked through and tired, the team of horses gave out. Despite considerable encouragement, they refused to move one more step up the mountain, choosing, in typical balky-horse fashion, to back up instead. They succeeded in backing the coach until they, quite literally, ran out of mountain. When the driver finally got them stopped, the vehicle was dangling right out over the edge of the canyon with the wagon tree tipped up and the horses' hind feet barely on the ground. Gramma and the kids were frantically extricated, followed by their baggage and the mail bags. They gratefully took shelter under a large spruce, where they turned, as they had been taught, to prayer. While they were thus engaged, the driver tried--unsuccessfully--to remedy the situation. The wagon remained hanging over the edge of the cliff. Can anyone say,"precarious?" Meanwhile the little family under the tree had finished praying. And it was as that exact moment that a second white-topped buggy came up over the hill. A buggy that was empty, save for the driver, a local real estate agent. Who, to the little family huddled under the tree, suddenly took on the aspect of a saviour. The man stopped and surveyed the situation, then climbed down and, using a knife, cut the traces holding the horses to the buggy (allowing the wagon to drop into the canyon several hundreds of feet below) and led the animals to safety. The mail man thanked him, threw his mail bags over one horse and mounted the other, and rode on over the mountain, abandoning his little group of paying passengers without a backward look. On the side of a mountain. In the rain. Don’t you hate days like that? Fortunately, the real estate man was very kind and loaded Gramma and her kids into his buggy and delivered them safely to the nearest village. The rest of the trip was fairly uneventful. Let’s face it. After this experience, most events would pale by comparison. Gramma and her brood got their visit. And, for generations to come, a story to tell. |
AuthorA writer from a family of writers, Diane published her first story at the age of nine. Born and raised on the last of the great old ranches of Southern Alberta and trained in journalism, Diane has written countless novels, shorts stories, articles, plays and songs. She and her husband, Grant live in Edmonton, Alberta and are the parents of six and the grandparents of seventeen. ArchivesCategories |
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